Spring Equals New Beginnings

This last week has been absolutely beautiful. The sun has been shining and the temperature has been well into the 50's. I have spent a lot of time this week enjoying the sun and catching up with my life. I have begun my spring cleaning and reorganization and I am on my way to starting the second half of my semester at school. It is exciting to know I am half way done with the semester and my clean house with the sun shining in lets me know that summer is on its way. A well deserved break if I do say so myself.

However, this lovely change in seasons has provoked a reflection in me. I have a tendency to get so focused on where I am going and what the future is that I can let the present fall by the wayside. This is something I really want to change. In all honesty, it is exhausting looking toward the future. Ben and I desperately want to be parents and so far it has been a difficult road trying to get there. That can really take over my mind and my emotions and get in the way of my focus on the here and now. I want to really be able to enjoy who I am today and not just who I want to be or where I want to go in life. Today I am a follower of God, a wife, a student, a nanny, and a friend. I want to make it my goal to let this be a new beginning for really refining those parts of myself. I want to be able to look back and say I did each of those things the best that I could rather than say I was so focused on the future I paid little attention to them. I want to be a better wife. I want to be more serving and hospitable in that way. I want to do a better job maintainging my home despite my busy schedule. I want to be more spontaneous and create more surprises and gifts for my husband. I want to continue to love God with all of my heart and really allow myself to be challenged in my spirituality, even if that means I need to step out of my comfort zone. I want to continue to be a dedicated student without it taking over my life. School is important but my God, my husband, and my friends far exceed a degree. I want to continue to love and teach David, whom I nanny for. He lights up my life and constantly teaches me about my self worth. It is amazing what a baby can really do for your soul. He reaffirms for me, that I will be an excellent mother when the time comes. But for now, I need to work to be the best I can at the things I already am. This spring is a time to look at life as a new beginning and to do things in a way that will make me and God proud of everyday that I lived.